My mom is in India right now, and has been sending me pictures every five minutes of clothes she is shopping for in Chennai. Clothes shopping has always been a pretty stressful ordeal for my family, considering that I've never been a huge fan of wearing Indian clothes. They tend to be uncomfortable, never fit right, and god forbid you get a stain on them: it's either send them to dry cleaning or send them to the back of the closet never to be worn again (happens most often in my house). And get just a little crazy on the dance floor...good luck getting those pit stains out.
Sure, it's pretty...but have you ever tried to run, nay, walk briskly in one of these? God help you if there is a fire.
When I was a kid, I could get away with just wearing churidhars and salwars, but when I turned fourteen, I was introduced to a new garment: the half saree.
Oh what's this, it's okay to show your midriff in public now? In the temple??
Half sarees are really not that bad - they're pretty lightweight and easy to wear.
However, they are portenders of more ominous things to come...the full saree. Those of you who have ever tried to wear a full saree understand - it requires a reasonable amount of time, manual dexterity, and safety pins just to put it on. So I never really understood how such an impractical garment is, like, the most commonly worn thing ever in India. My grandmothers for example, have only ever worn sarees for the past 50 years - they cook in it, do chores in it, sleep in it...everything.
This doesn't make it look easy. And the real thing is even harder than this makes it look.
The sarees for fancier occasions are heavier and more embroidered. Not to mention having to wear heels - walking becomes an actual hazard (essentially why I remain in my seat when I go to weddings).
She probably weighs around 250lb right now
Something interesting about sarees, though, is what they tell you about different cultural norms and rules of propriety. For example here in the US, wearing shorts and capris is fine, but baring your midriff is considered a little more licentious. Wearing a saree blouse that doesn't cover your belly is okay in India, but lift the saree but two inches past your ankles, and everyone starts freaking out!
A white person asked me this not too long ago: why is it that formal attire for Indian women is traditional (sarees, churidhars, etc.), whereas formal attire for Indian men is just a suit. I'd never really thought about that! I mean, I did...the many thousands of times I complained about how to I had to wear these fancy clothes to Indian parties while my brother got to wear what he wears to school everyday...but I had never really thought about why. Men do wear traditional clothes, but really only at the fanciest and most traditional sort of occasions. If a guy wears a Sherwani to anything other than a wedding ceremony, he gets extra credit. Even in India, every day clothing for guys is just pants and shirts.
It may have to do with the fact that with the British being in India for nearly a hundred years, they kind of passed on their style to the Indian men working for them, making them wear British designed uniforms and exposing them to their own white men clothing styles. While Indian women on the other hand basically just stayed indoors, didn't have to wear uniforms, and probably didn't get much exposure to the fashion of British women.
And frankly, this doesn't look much more comfortable than a saree.
That's the logical explanation, but I'm convinced it was all a clever ploy by Indian men from the beginning. They knew that their wives would want new clothes when they got fatter, so they invented a piece of clothing that easily adjusts to your size, so wouldn't keep bugging their husbands for money to buy new clothes.
But ha! Foo on you Indian men, because I've never met an Indian woman who was like, "oh dear, I've gained a few pounds...let me just adjust my saree" No! it's more like, "oh dear, I've gained a few pounds... I'm so depressed that I need to go shopping"
That brings me to another aspect of Indian clothing that causes me great stress: shopping. Those who know me already know that I am easily overwhelmed by choice. Take me and put me in one of these...
...and I will start having a panic attack (maybe that's why clothing stores for women are largely run by men). The trouble is, shopping in India is such an ordeal because everybody tries to copy everybody else and finding something you like means having to sift through a a million cheap imitations. Combine that with annoying crowds, hot weather, jet lag...it's all very stressful.
This clip from a Telugu movie sums it up nicely (sorry! I wasn't able to find a version with English subs)
